A Little (Recent) History

This morning I made myself oatmeal, then faced the daunting task of getting from the kitchen to the table to eat it. It seems a simple enough task. But I am on crutches. Again.

I suppose blogging about my health issues along the way would make providing the backstory to this morning's frustrations a little more brief, but I didn't...so I'll try to keep this as short as possible. On December 6, 2013, the ordeal that is now (hopefully) coming to an end, began. I had an ache in my thigh on the drive into work, and within and hour and a half, was leaving for the emergency room with an excruciating stabbing pain in my femur with each step. I left with a diagnosis of "leg pain", which is not a diagnosis at all, but a symptom. A second trip from work to the ER resulted in an orthopedic referral, which resulted in a diagnosis...or so I thought. But after two months on crutches for a femoral stress fracture, total non-weight bearing, the pain was still there. So I spent another two months on crutches, developing painful hip bursitis along the way. Skip ahead two pain clinics, a new orthopedic doctor, countless imaging, a spine surgeon, and an oncologist...and now I finally have an accurate diagnosis. Tomorrow will mark two weeks since I underwent Radiofrequency Ablation of an Otseoid Osteoma...a small benign bone tumor.

I could go a lot of ways with this post. I could delve into the shortcomings or advantages of modern Western medicine. I could touch on the widespread complications and struggles of chronic pain. I could explain the toll that "not knowing" what's wrong takes on your life. I could focus on so many things...but my point today is this:

I am grateful.

I am grateful that the end diagnosis was something fixable. I am grateful that the endless pain that I was in for nearly two years has heightened my compassion for others, not only with chronic pain, but with any long term struggle. I am grateful that I was able to further my education in the time that I could not work. I am grateful for so much more than I could possibly express.

Gratitude is what turns our every day struggles into lessons and opportunities for growth. It is what ordinary events into extraordinary moments.

For nearly as long as my health issue has plagued me, my husband and I have shared a practice of gratitude. Each evening as we sit down for dinner, we share one thing we are grateful for. There are times when great things have happened, other times when it seems the best thing to happen all day is laying down to sleep, believing tomorrow will be better. Most often, it is something small and simple, like the fact that we get to sit down to a good meal together.

I encourage and challenge all of you to add a daily gratitude practice to your life. You can do as we do, and make it a joint endeavor, or you can begin to keep a gratitude journal. At the end of each day, write down three things you are grateful for. An interesting twist would be to write down things you see as negatives, and use gratitude to make them positive. For instance, if I have a sink full of dirty dishes that need to be washed, it means that we have good food to eat. Try it out. See what happens.

#Stress #HealthyLiving